Lifestyles & Relationships

Meet My Hubby!

**Rich Hoskins**, FBI agent (retired), International Instructor, Sci-fi enthusiast, Pop Pop

Self-Care and the Everyday Man

Part 1

Growing up on a farm in rural Virginia, it wasn’t common to go to the hospital or even the Doctor’s office. I still remember occasions when the doctor came to the house. What were considered normal ailments were treated with home remedies and only the most severe illnesses or injuries triggered professional intervention. People simply had no money to pay for medical care that wasn’t considered critical, and most things fell well below that threshold. This all resulted in many conditions, both physical and mental, being dismissed. In that culture, at that time, it was discouraged to even mention or complain about many illnesses. No one complained about the poor nutritional value of fried chicken or pork chops because it was accomplishing the need to put food on the table. Besides, there was too much work to be done on the farm every day to listen to anybody complaining that they just felt a little down. Given that environment it’s not surprising that no one talked about self-care, especially related to their feelings, and that was particularly true for men.

As an adult I continued the tendency to largely ignore the importance of self-care. Although I completely understood the inference when the term “Taking a mental health day” became popular, but I dismissed it as a sign of non-commitment or laziness. My childhood was still influencing what I considered to be a legitimate health care need. Don’t judge! How many of you considered the theme of “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” to be an enlightened young man, who was so in touch with his mental health needs, that he skipped school to practice essential self-care? That movie reflected how society use to view taking a “Mental Health Day.” And so, for years I worked well past quitting time, sacrificed minimal recommended amounts of sleep, ate fast food on the go and dismissed periods of worry and anxiety as acceptable consequences of having adult personal and professional responsibilities. Now that I am older, I am more aware of the importance of self-care.

To break the negative influence my childhood orientation had on my way of viewing self-care, I needed an equally significant intervention. In my case, it came in the form of advice from my boss. I had been recently promoted and was working well past quitting time. The boss contacted my home on a personal matter, spoke to Karen and expressed shock that I was still at the office. As I recall he said something to the effect “I run the place and I have been home for 45 minutes.” He contacted me and made it clear that a failure to structure my time in a way that creates balance between personal time and work wasn’t going to allow me to be the best I could be at my new job. I was amazed to discover how simple changes to my schedule, and strict adherence to them allowed me to be much more productive and get home a lot earlier. It was the beginning of my shedding the influences of the past and joining the rest of society in a much more enlightened understanding of self-care.

Next month I’ll share some commonsense practices I’ve found to be great for improving my quality of life as I become more self-aware.

-Rich-

*******************

Appreciating Wine is Not Bougie II

If you’ve been following this blog a few months you may remember, “Wine is not Bougie.” A featured article in Lifestyles from November 2021. Is it just me or lately have you also been seeing and hearing more, that wine is the drink of choice for the grown and sexy? There’s even a new TV show, Grand Crew, where in it a group of friends’ favorite hang-out is a wine bar. It’s an urban twist on the show Friends, but in this case the friends are first generation black millennials. My first thought was, a wine bar seems an unlikely hangout for this crew. But after I thought about it, maybe I’m missing something, and wine is closing in on beer and other adult beverages as the go to choice for an increasing number of grown folks. Am I wrong?? At any rate, I think wine education is interesting and fun! For those who feel the same, I hope you like this.. -K-

Scenario: You’re in the store trying to decide on a wine to buy…

What to Look For on a Wine Label

*************

SELF CARE: Working from Home Ergonomics

Help My Neck is Killing Me!

Since you’ve been working from home are you noticing nagging pain in your neck, shoulders and back? If yes, you’re not alone. Poor posture while working on your computer could be the culprit. When I was going to the office, I rarely experienced the kind of neck and shoulder pain I began to have when I started working from home. I became curious why there was such a difference in my comfort levels between my work and home offices. What I discovered was that proper ergonomics was part of my company’s office design. Desks were situated at the right height, and I was shocked when I found out the price tag of the office chairs! Let’s just say, it was several hundred dollars and way more expensive than I would typically consider spending for my home workspace. Bottomline, the way your body is positioned in front of your computer does matter. If you’re not already aware of this issue, it’s time to stop, take notice, and take it seriously. Otherwise, you could be opting in for a long struggle with low back and neck pain.

Check out below, Ergonomics Dos and Don’ts for tips to make your work from home day more comfortable and productive. Also, Donovan Green is here with some workday stretches you can do to prevent all those aches and pains. -K-

Ergonomic Dos and Don’ts For Anyone Who Works at Home

https://www.bu.edu/articles/2020/10-ergonomics-dos-and-donts-for-those-now-working-from-home/

· Do Ensure a Straight Seating Posture. …

· Don’t Use a Desk Which is Not Optimum for Your Height

· Do Move Frequently While Working. …

· Do Keep the Monitor at the Right Distance. …

· Don’t Skip Meals. …

· Do Take Frequent Breaks While Working. …

· Don’t Stare at the Screen for Too Long. …

· Do Maintain a Position Balance.